LIFE : Dealing with my anxiety.

      I have tried to figure out how to write an entry on my anxiety issues for months now, and I've even written a couple entries, but they were so jumpy that it didn't make sense.  I realized that actually writing about it while actively fighting it would probably make it the easiest.  That actually sounds like torture when I think about it, because while I'm fighting an anxiety attack my brain is firing off in rapid spurts of different things. 

     I've suffered from anxiety issues since I was probably about 14.  Probably even earlier if my fits of crying when I was in elementary school qualified as anxiety/panic issues. I would write a paper in pencil and would mess up on the very last word on the back of the page, and I would have to start completely over because I just knew my teacher would be able to tell I had made a mistake and would think less of me, or something.  I'm serious, I would have an absolute melt down and freak out over it.

REVIEW : Diamond Candles

     Review time!  Just what are we taking a look at this time, Skeddio?  I'm glad you asked!  I just recently went a little crazy having noticed that Diamond Candles was having a sale of 45% off any candle they sell, and well, I ended up spending almost eighty dollars on candles.  Oops?  I've purchased these candles in the past, and they are made with wonderful quality, and well worth the twenty-five to twenty-eight dollar price tag.

    Now you might be cringing over the price, but let me explain the cost!  They're made with soy wax, and you get hours of use out of them.  The bonus?  Each candle contains a ring.  When I first purchased the rings, the candles themselves contained a ring that could be just a simple costume jewelry ring worth $10, but a few contained rings worth anywhere from a hundred to five thousand dollars.  Now, out of the candles I've had, I've only found the cheap end of the rings, but with the exception of two of the rings, they've all been really pretty. 

4 of 5 rings that I've gotten from the candles.  Top two are not exactly lovely.

Technical Difficulties -- My apologies!

     I just found out that people have attempted to post comments on my blog, and they're not actually getting posted to my blog! This really saddens me, since I've missed out on contact with any readers that might have come across my little world. However, I do believe I have fixed the issue, and hopefully from here on out I won't be missing any comments from anyone again. Sorry about that y'all!

REVIEW : Remote Area Medical

     I was really only planning on beauty reviews and similar things, but after I encountered this group of awesome people, I really felt like this was a thing I should write about. These people need to be given high fives, hand shakes, and hugs for what they are doing for people who can’t afford health care.

     That trailer doesn’t look like much, does it? I didn’t think so either, but once I checked into this group and even watched their documentary, “Remote Area Medical”, which if you have Netflix and a little spare time, you should definitely check out. (Actually about two weeks before I had even heard of them I was trying to find something to watch on Netflix and their documentary popped up, it wasn’t until after my failed attempt to go on Friday afternoon that it clicked in my head and I went home and watched it Friday night.) Heads up to the squeamish people though, they do show people having teeth pulled, I wish I had been warned. Maybe there is a warning in the beginning and I just didn’t see it, but hey, I’ve warned you. What a gal, right?
 

     They show up in random towns, sometimes larger towns, sometimes smaller more rural towns, like mine. They provide free medical, dental and vision to anyone who shows up at their ‘doorstep’. They even had a ‘mammovan’ there and were providing mammograms to women. I heard talk that they were doing other lady oriented medical things as well.

A Year Later...

     It's been a year since a friend of mine decided to take his own life.  Let me just state this, he and I weren't that close, and still, his suicide rocked me.  I spent days in tears after, and months later, I still would cry when something would hit me about his suicide.  I cried the first time I saw a picture of his son, who was just a couple months old when he committed suicide, just because of how much he looks just like him.  I wanted to write a blog on dealing with someone's suicide, but every time I wrote it, it just felt so weird.  I couldn't find the words, and honestly, I think it's because of that emotion I can't find words for.  Instead, I've decided to write a blog on where I'm at now, a year later.

     It was the most chaotic period of emotions I have ever experienced in my life.  I went from sad, to angry, to just this raw emotion I had never experienced before in my life, and I still don't have a word to describe it.  For anyone who has ever experienced someone taking their own lives, I give you my condolences, because in my experience, it was one of the hardest things I have ever dealt with emotionally.  It was like a tornado and earthquake of emotions, just as soon as I'd get angry the anger would subside and I'd be hit with guilt, and then sadness, and back to anger, all before I could even figure out what was going on.  I wouldn't wish that upon anyone.

Get to know Skeddio!

      Who is Skeddio? That's such a hard question to answer, I can't simply explain it in one short paragraph. I was an especially weird child that loved to stop at Harris Ranch to use the tiny toilet for little girls, and stay in any motel that might have a shower cap that I could take with me. I don't think there was any explanation for my obsession with the shower caps, I would just put them on to sit in front of the television to watch TV. I believed my Cabbage Patch dolls, Red and Gobo from Fraggle Rock, and My Little Ponies were alive. I even toted around a gummy rat forever believing that it was my pet, until my brother bit it's gummy little head off. I was also a 'bag lady' as in, I would put my jeans on, then shorts, and then a skirt and then a fluffy frilly slip because it was the prettiest and needed to be seen. My shirts were worn backwards, too. I also carried around plastic bags of My Little Ponies anywhere we went and kept them on choke chains so they couldn't run away.